I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
every time I worry about a career mistake, I remember Michelle Pfeiffer did Grease 2.
Walking home still drunk in snow. Snowflakes are my only hydration..Need moreee
so i havent checked yet but im almost positive that my left ass cheek is bruised. any idea what happened last night.
what the fuck man? i was JUST texting you the same thing. FUCK
Life's too short to consider the larger psychological underpinnings of my lust.
Man, the last time I saw you you were giving me a thumbs up while being pulled out the bar by your belt from some girl.
Omg it was awesome. At one point she says "cum in me, I'm too old to get pregnant".
But I swear to god if I'm awkwardly there while you try to have sex with someone again I'm getting high with your dad
I'm happily sitting on the toilet cause I'm too tired to move. I'm considering making this my permanent residence. It has a lot to offer.
If you get home and there is an older woman there, its my mom. She wants to come and see the place after work. Just an FYI. Not the older sluts I bang.
This is exactly why you shouldn't bang your bartender. Although the awkward free shots are a plus.
You know, I think when I have a lot of free time, thats when I pick up odd lovers. Maybe keeping busy is key to not using my vagina
I sat on the bathroom floor yelling "hell hath no fury!" for about 20 minutes.
It's definitely revenge time.
You'd be proud. Took my birth control today at 12:30 with a Budweiser. Guy across the bar saw and held his bottle up to salute me 😂
Hitting up all my dealers for my birthday grams is paying off
Randomize
