Sometimes I find that I've been touching my boob(s) without even realizing it.
I proposed and she said yes man.
You realize the irony of surrendering on independence day, right?
I ate one of your animal crackers. just one. ok four. but no frosting. ok frosting.
I wonder if that one guy remembers you sticking salami to his forehead when he was passed out on new years eve.
I don't not like him. It's just wierd talking to him because we both know I fucked his wife.
Well anything after a French guy would have been a disappointment. But I'm fairly certain he was just trying to masturbate into me.
it was good sex until i became a rubber doll and he became a jack hammer, so i guess overall it was good
we found him passed out on the baseball field with two 40oz and wearing a tophat.
Where did he get the tophat?
You turn 21 at midnight!
This is better than being born!!
After you smoke one night. Just whisper in a barely audible voice, "Grey Poupon"
I invited him to my hotel room via snapchat. I'm one hell of a classy bitch
Just googled myself and a bunch of boob shots of me came up. Apparently my phone automatically uploaded them to my google plus.
Please google me ASAP and ensure I corrected this...
I'll give you one guess. It has a cock and I want it
She yelled Carpe Diem when she orgasmed. Is it too early to marry her?
I kinda realized titty fucking is purely for our enjoyment, they dont really get much out of it, except for a guy sitting on them and and a dick bouncing of their chin
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