doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
wait one more day. tuesday is my official "i hit on you and/or we hooked up this weekend" friend request day.
i know you like preteen girls so i'm gonna offer you some advice...dump a bucket of glitter on yourself and walk into the sunlight. they will come running.
THEY ARE MY AGE. THEY ARE YOUR LITTLE SISTER'S AGE THIS IS A DELICATE MATTER. CAPS LOCK
you just stood there spinning and got mad if anyone tried to stop you
Just woke up bloody and clutching a rear view mirror I'm pretty sure is from my car. For those of you keeping score at home this is why I stopped drinking four loko.
I just don't know what he sees in my vagina...and that scares me.
There where 3 half naked girls passed out on the pool table, I crawled under it and just as I was about to go to sleep some guy walks up and says: "dude nice spot" walks away and comes back with a pillow.
2:23 am. Im just at McDonalds, in my pajamas, at 2 am, paying in nickles, cuz thats how i roll.
2:26 am. Im just being thrown out of McDonalds, in my pajamas, at 2 am, without my nickles, cuz thats how i roll.
Something about Sunday night screams phone sex
I'm gonna take a nap by the fireplace and pretend like I know what day it is.
Lol yeah. Because I just woke him up to blow him for being hot.
My cardio is walking around the office looking for free food.
Why make bad decisions when I can watch you?
What’s the best way to find out if he’s into anal?
I think you have the wrong number, but good luck with that
Randomize
