i would punch a child for taco bell
cant go down on her man, her vagoo reminds me of a face hugger from aliens
Ps if we're still living vicariously through each other, you had sex on a beach last night
Well he's not exactly single.. It's like an open relationship his wife doesn't know about
having my hair in braids makes puking so easy. i am being an indian every halloween
my momz letting me make the christmas card in photoshop
so that means christmas in space?
imma make our dead cats ghosts like obi wan kenobi
First day of class and I'm in a bar drinking pitcher #3. Foreshadowing?
I am far too hungover to deal with the fact I can hear you masturbating in the bathroom.
how many people can say they bit their tattoo off?
He was leaving the restaurant I was going to as I was parking. I didn't want to scream, "hey, didn't I jerk you off?" Out of my window at 10 am
The night is not complete until I am drnk and speaking to inanimate objects
So i had a lucid dream about blowing myself. This is why people love me
She is 6 months pregnant and gets more action at bars than I do.
It got weird I got a phone call while looking at porn and the video started playing while on the phone full on porn audio.
we f'd six times
f'd?
its sunday, i cant say fucked
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