At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
either she doesn't know how to dress properly on a sunday morning stroll, or I just saw a 60 year old on a walk of shame
the spit in my mouth is still 99% not mine.
You seriously looked at the house acorss the street and implied that you thought they had nice Easters.
I'm sorry to inform you but your friends with benefits card has expired has the beginning of the year. If you wish to renew your card you must submit a picture of a fully erect penis. Please note that not all request for a FWB card is accepted.
Just saw pictures of a pregnant teen from my hometown with an American flag wrapped around her naked body posted on FB without irony. These are my roots.
I wonder when walk of shame thursdays in the rain will finally make me stop drinking.
They're fucking on the bed next to me. I took adderall and smoked so there's no fucking help for me.
He has a bathrroom scale in his room with an alarm attached to it so anything over 150 sets it off and in his drinking stupper he can make a run for it.
Do you think showing up at his door with bourbon and chicken is too forward?
Has anyone heard from Jamie or has she actually just been having sex for 48 hours?
They think I'm one of them. I'm about to get drunk in a Santa suit and bust down the door singing Christmas carols.
You can cuddle me. Word on the street is my ass is ridiculous.
You can have my vag. Its useless without you.
We're sitting on the kitchen floor drinking and talking about mounting real light sabers to the dog's head.
Randomize
