Dual....:-)
Why. Ill be the rabbit if ull be the carrot.
i was just lookin through my fb pics and i think im with a cat in like 40% of them..: how sad is my life
hey my socially awkward cousin is our designated driver for summer, we just have to put up with her wierd shit.
seriously this is one of those moments where im glad i dont really talk to or know the people i sleep with
Well said.
never. drinking. again.
lets not get ahead of ourselves.
the kid next to me in training is drinking sangria. its 9am here in case you couldnt calculate. its going to be a good year.
They have a guy from new zealand living under their stairs.. they don't charge him rent. He just buys food and booze and bartends their house parties.
Apparently blazed enough to think that the sizzling meatballs in the pan were calling your name...Ssssteeeeeve
i wasn't about to bring her gummy handcuffs to her father's funeral
Hannah wants to know if she cant borrow your stats notes because she threw up on hers.
Yes, but it's not new to me. It's like every time a new guy finds out I'm a squirter it's a novelty so they make me squirt and squirt and squirt until their bed is completely soaked. And then afterwards they complain that there isn't a dry bit to sleep on. No shit Sherlock.
It's one of those days where you order the free Papa John's pizza so the delivery guy can bring you Coke to go with your rum. The tip was more than the order.
So last night was the first of "I got cut off before I walked in the bar".
look, im sorry that i yelled at your little brother, threw my car keys at him and smashed a stale cookie with a pool cue, but i swear to god i didn't poop on the floor. it was one of your dogs.
Randomize
