So after THIS dui, I've decided to stop driving. Not drinking, just quit driving.
it's business casual sex. like no kissing, shake hands after, occasional frequency
i regret nothing . he quoted dr. suess . he deserved that bj .
Trying to guess which perfume the stripper was wearing based on my bf's clothes
Just found a partially digested mushroom under my bed. Thanks for that.
I saw you eating fruit and doing shots off people passed out
we got cut off at 8 am. He spilled his drink three times on the plane. this should be one hell of a vegas trip
of course we have a beer bong
how else would we feed our christmas tree
She wants to go as a facebook "like" for halloween, but right now her costume looks more like the hamburger helper hand with broken fingers.
Haha he's lucky I don't kick him back into the land of the majestic handjobs
Haha! You know I mean that in a positive way. Like, "let them eat cake!" Or in our case, "let them achieve obesity from the two entree plate at Panda Express!"
I just told the sun to stop. That hungover.
I threw up vodka and borscht. I'm done with life...I threw this up in a McDonald's bathroom btw.
He called yelling about whhhhhhiskey and enchiladas I heard sirens in the background last time I talked to him b
man do I wish I knew who this naked guy in my room was...
Randomize