i fuckib htae you, you church bitch.
Stoned at DSW. SO MANY SHOES! THEY'RE FREAKING ME OUT.
he was on top of me and all of a sudden stopped and starting picking his nose...i asked him if he was okay, he sort of looked confused, and he told me he had a booger that hurt. guess its a good thing i wasnt planning on dating this guy
Breakfast is bomb, yo. McDonald's before ten thirty is like Katie Holmes before Tom Cruise.
Fell asleep in bio again. Sometimes i feel like college is just one really expensive nap.
I learned nothing from that class except drinking and chemistry go together great.
he was terrible at kissing, so i just kept letting him motorboat me. he seemed very pleased with my choice
I made him hve sex with me in the elevator so that I could put my finger down in never have I ever.
Just flooded the bathroom while masturbating in the shower. Managed to squeege most of it up. Desperately need to get laid.
you kept thanking chef boyardee for having pull tab cans
Successfully put eye drops in while driving with my glasses on. Stoner level: expert
I want to get up and tell you that smells delicious but I'm struggling with the idea of pants
I tried to have a quickie with him at the company happy hour. I think I need to quit my job.
Star Wars means nothing to me. I know only the basics. Darth is Luke's father. R2 is short, C3 is gold. Yoda sings Rainbow Connection. The kinda stuff EVERYONE knows.
Basically we had a threesome in one room and a fivesome in the next room. Its what I like to call a win win situation.
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