we played lady & the tramp with a hash brown from McDonald's....im in love.
His penis was definitely too big to be the type that wants commitment. Shit.
All I did this weekend was get my life in order. I feel like I wasted my time.
Just asked the bartender if I could use the register to see my grades.
I think online classes were designed around the concept of day drinking.
I blew him and did charles barkley impressions at the same time. what a pro
I had a dream about masturbating with toys I can't afford.
My sex life and finances are equally in shambles.
Stop making Mac and cheese and sit on his face. FINISH HIM
Well his arms broken so they only cuffed his good wrist to his belt. That's how he cast smacked me in custody.
It's meant to be, Cynthia. You, him, and your developed breasts are meant for each other.
I want you to get off the plane and get directly into my pants
Basically I will actually need a reindeer pulled sleigh to make it to all the penises in one night.
Seriously. Are we going out tonight? If we're not, I'm going to put on sweatpants and do drugs.
My first love was gay too, it's okay.
In the last 2 hours I managed to have romantic starlit sex on the beach as the tide came in with not only just a gorgeous man, but one who happens to be Eastern European and finishing Harvard law school.
Oh wow. I want to be you right now.
Randomize
