pwbgyin
what?
penguin condom
dude wtf did we explode in my microwave last night?
idk but i think it had a face
i dont nkow, theres a guy slesping next to me and im wearing 8 tsthirts? wtf happened last night? will you come get me.
i think im in thre room next to you
he just asked if i would like him to change his diet so his jizz tastes better. keeper? i think so.
Just watched a guy pause a bluetooth convo to puke outside of esso. gotta love orangeville
i just ran into my boss at the liquor store. we didnt exchange words, just nodded in mutual understanding.
The bartender just told me he would have me face down in his pillow by the end of the night. I hate when you make me go to gay clubs.
we are watching a video on ethics because somebody wrote "butt sex" on the attendance sign in sheet
He sent me a picture of him bent over showing his asshole with the caption "vwahla".... No more tequila for either of you
just made one giant jello shot... if i have to study on a saturday night, i'm gonna do it as drunk as possible
I might have beaten my fastest all time record going from "I really really like this girl" to "fuck that bitch"
You fell asleep on the toilet and he was like uh should I take her off?
If there is a heaven, that's what it will be. Bagel Bites and cunnilingus.
He has a wall filled with panties from past hook ups. So no, I didn't fuck him.
You shouted “im bobby labonte!” In the process of shoutgunning a beer. He said you were too redneck for him...
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