it was a shit show
We all have our days. But yours might be on the internet.
yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
just a forewarning-if you come home and hang out with your stupid girlfriend the entire time that you are here/fail to get wasted with us i will wish either death upon you or that you truly do turn gay when you return to the navy.
i celebrated the independence of our country by dry heaving tequila all morning. so classy. happy 4th.
I am not deleting the internet history anymore, now I am going for shock value.
Andrew is trying to convince me that i took your virginity. Please tell me he is lying.
define virginity.
She just kept tellin me God was coming back and he was leavin her with a bag of stale doritoes and shitty friends.
She told me to wait on the sofa while she freshened up. She's been in the bathroom for an hour. I have a bad feeling about this.
You stuck your entire fist into a full jar of peanut butter and starting assaulting people
There's a Russian guy here. In the bar. Drinking vodka. Wearing a trench coat and a hat and a mustache. Idk where the confusion is.
He was bigger soft than my ex was hard. A gold medal rebound.
I just found a half a joint in my bed. . .don't know if this qualifies as a proud moment or a cry for help
She showed up ready for sex all night.. with waters and a meat and cheese tray
Moral of the story - don't craft naked. Your nipples with thank me.
If its not for food we ain't going out.
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