so explain again why im purple
no
i crunched every chip from the dorito bag and poured it in the vase. never again will i have to deal with cool ranch fingers.
nothing says new school year like ambulances and police road blocks.
I owe her a pancake or a second hand orgasm
No i'm not calming down the girl at white castle did not need to see the picture of my dick on your phone.
I think my hookup is starting to fall for me. Time to break his heart.
The light burnt out and he thinks the power is out in the whole house. He is cooking a hog dog over two candles. I'm gonna see if he'll make me one
These are all good points. But, I think your under estimating what it's like to be held upside down for a standing 69
First sunburned tits of the season. And it's only April... I feel like it's going to be a good summer.
I don't want to ruin date night, but you have no idea how hard it is to poop whilst looking at cute puppies.
Someone called asking about the gate code and I said "hashtag" for # instead of "pound." Ugh. I feel so dirty.
Edible... I FEEL CLOSER TO THE UNIVERSE AND I DEF TRAVELED IN TIME. I THINK I CAN READ MINDS NOW.
Verdict: uncircumcised.
I put him in the supply closet, used the copy paper to build a fort around him and his wheelchair, then he fucked me in the fort.
I did not marry a roomba.
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