We need to get cat food
Nevermind, the cat will eat lucky charms
you want to go make fun of the strippers on try out night
i got kicked out last time for laughing
I told him to come back in 5mins cause i needed to take a few more shots before i could talk to him
I told him I'd give him a BJ if he admited Hanson was good.
i need to buy one of the child leashes to wear at mardi gras or else im never making it out alive
Hurricane Sex Time is the only thing iv said since it started.
Also, I am ligit concerned that I might compulsively start collecting vibrators like Pokemon.
She was the shot vending machine at the party. But free.
Have you ever realized how cool bread is? Like so many things taste good on it. Like its crazy to think that peanut butter and turkey can both taste good on the same thing.
He snapchatted me his dick and he's circumcised....BRB going to hug his Mom
got into a verbal altercation with Luke Harangoty last night over a table. Called him a cross-eyed fuck and got the table.
I am. I woke up on someone's front lawn dressed as max Payne also be proud.
I've just been thinking about sangria a lot lately, like an adult.
idk i just feel really unsatisfied. like something's missing from my life... maybe it's chicken nuggets...
However, pretty glad I spent the night puking on my car instead of fucking him. Then I'd REALLY be miserable.
Randomize
