I will show your tits more attention than Michael Jackson's death.
I wont touch it. I promise i wont touch it. JUST GET UNDER THE DAMN TABLE PLEASE.
she danced around my room naked waving around the gold trojan magnum condoms singing "i have the golden ticket."
little did she know i was taping her the whole time.
he opened the microwave and beer cans poured out
Just saw my bank statement. It literally goes liquor store pizza place liquor store pizza place bar bar bar liquor store pizza place 711 for snacks withdrawl for drugs rinse and repeat
I need to stop smoking. I just talked to corn.
It was my little brother's 14th birthday today. Didn't know what to get him so I just showed him how to use incognito tabs on google chrome.
I got high with the cantor. Rethinking this whole non-practicing Jew thing.
Again??? Now we can't ever fucking go there again STOP PEEING IN FOYERS
Well, I washed his beard with dish soap and then I fucked him three times.
Everyone is out there getting real jobs and I just realized I've been "washing" my clothes with fabric softener for two months.
He is such a generous lover, I can look past the fact his name is fucking Bob.
Well, I guess you are not meant to have this fucking picture of an adorable baby duck.
Are we DOING anything for lunch...if sex is involved, let's just be straight forward and stop wasting the first half hour! We just need to get to the point
JUST BECAUSE I ANSWER THE DOOR NAKED CARRYING A BOTTLE OF RUM DOESN'T MEAN YOU CAN STARE NEIGHBORS.
Randomize
