Called my dealer in tears and we talked for an hour until I felt better. That's the way it should be.
Dude she hit me with my own penis and it hurt. I've never been cock slapped but she slapped me with my own cock so it has to be worse.
He won't let me go to the bars unless I can manage to get flip flops on.
Sounds like he's doing this for your own good...
I let my daddy issue flag fly free last night.
She was wearing some slutty variation of a toga and giving the entire bus a pep talk on why we should black out tonight...I'M IN LOVE AND I DON'T CARE WHO KNOWS IT!
His dick is as big as my 7" heels... Awkwardness is forgotten.
I heard the bride mutter "I should have brought a fucking tranquilizer". I'm not at all surprised that you got banned from the bar afterwards.
i feel like when you brought up the possibility of you getting pregnant the sexting is over
A Morman just tried to recruit me and I told him "Trust me, you don't want me"
I think he has some internal "man stuff" that keeps getting in the way.
Like alcoholism and general douchbagary.
He called me 'pal' while complimenting how well I took his load on my face. I've officially been fuckbuddy-zoned.
Giiirrrllll. Back to back snaps of dicks. Two different guys sent me their dick at the same time. This is totally what our founding fathers meant with life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness.
There's hope in those eyes, for a better tomorrow or more cocaine, we may never know, but there's hope.
After the bar we stopped to Meijer where I found myself singing little mermaid while rubbing a pack of hotdogs on my face..
We bird danced in front of the bird cages for 20 minutes. I think it was our way of being like fuck you guys you're in a cage and we're on summer break.
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