we are all sexual creatures
yea maybe. but you're not. you're not getting any.
just shaved my legs at the gas station bathroom before going to the club. is that too ghetto?
Do you ever make guys send you dick pictures just cause it's hilarious?
As soon as I saw the video camera and red light on, I started rolling my eyes when he would put it in me and telling him maybe his dick was too small cause I didn't feel anything...trust me that tape is going nowhere
my mom used to put diet coke in my bottle. i can pretty much handle anything.
Who would have guessed that on my moms birthday she'd have sex with the door open. :(
Hey man. We haven't met but my name is Ben. I threw up a bunch at your house last night. I heard you smoke though so I'll smoke you out anytime.
I think my vagina has grown over, not unlike earring holes when not used in a long amount of time.
Here's the level of my committment: I'm not participating in the Olympic opening ceremonies drinking game. THIS IS SERIOUS.
It was like a square peg in a round hole... I've never seen one shaped like a stick of butter...
I just realized that every possible way I walk to campus I walk by the house of someone I slept with
Is her birthday actually on cinco de mayo? That makes so much sense
You stumbled in the door as high as a kite, & ran into the table. I asked you if you were all right. You replied with "I don't have any soup."
Oh man I missed being single! Two different guys just sent me dick pics during my kid’s little league game.
I just had a morning three-some with marijuana and a detachable shower-head
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