Let's get naked and see who's stronger.
yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
Had to use Google translator to be able to tell the cleaning lady not to throw away the condoms we have strategically placed throughout the house.
Someone said we're out of ice. You collapsed on the spot and started sobbing, saying 'but where will all the polar bears live". That drunk.
Worst PDA I've ever seen. She even licked the mustard off his mustach
I had some like war flashbacks of giving someone a handjob and i was trying to figure out who it was.
the repo guy said it was the first time he'd ever started to repo a car with someone fucking inside of it. he might have said 'doing it' instead.
We finally have the house to ourselves and your out playing Lance Fucking Armstrong
I just remembered that last night I ate nachos off of someone else's table with a stranger
Lets have the type of night where its 5am and one of us has definitely punched someone who has been on a Disney Channel show.
We celebrated International Women's Day by spending $700 and taking our tops off at the strip club
The boys offered to pay but we went halfs because we're feminists
Im having a st. Get way fucked till i speak Irish pre game party. Bring a compass cause we are about to get lost
Just remember, Dont make worse choices than american flag pants to your own birthday party
She's one of those people who could be either 16 or 23. In which case she's too old for me or in dangerously jailbait territory for you, bro.
I'm about to go get lunchables and alcohol. Take that adulthood
Randomize
