BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
you don't understand, he speaks spanish and is tall. i have to do him.
Well on a lighter note, guess who just threw up in the elevator
Remember the girl passed out in front of my fireplace?
In fact, not a good idea to go into any house alone after a man invites you in from his balcony.
nope, if she's going to skank it up with ginge-a-saurus douche she deserves the silent treatment.
He's reached the drunk point where he's trying to convince the family to buy falcons as pets. Can't wait to see how my steak turns out
Well, it's either jungle juice or memory of the night... It's unfortunate I can't have both
He did a 4 wheel burnout and yelled at the cops "Sorry! It's for a school project!". HOW does he think of this shit?
It feels like I'm breathing out my heart and it spreads through my limbs to my fingertips.
I knew things were bad when I walked in on you feeding juice to your iPhone
Yesterday was just the icing on the rejection cake that was my week
on my way to nyc to take a survey about my sexual activity. if you dont hear from me for a few days, assume they had me committed...
I'm throwing in the towel on today. The puke gods have won this war
How have I seen you throw up on yourself 3 different times, yet we weren't Facebook friends until I accidentally hooked up with your ex?
Randomize