2:23 am: come sit on my lap i have a stick that'll keep you in place
thanks...oh and i got my period
told you
oh hush
Bar. Show boob. Just one. Free drinks. Instant friends
Guys only need one. Little known secret. You're welcome.
The whole way homeyou were flapping your arms up and down, and when I asked why you said you were trying to tell Tony Danza about the angels.
I just answered "If only I knew" for a quiz in criminology, she loved it. I got an A
we've been dating more than a month and i just realized there's no hair on his chest..
you've had sex with him. you must've seen him naked.
nah, i feel like naked sex would be getting too serious for us..
the last thing i remember is ordering pitchers of white russians....
well the first picture of me in 2011 involves a viking helmet and chugging champagne. i like this year already.
I never want to hear the words 'my therapist says . . . ' while naked again.
I couldn't sleep so I took 4 shots of vodka and promptly threw up in the sink. Happy Thursday
Well, remember that night we took shrooms at graces an had to leave immediately to go home and hold each other on the futon and sob for four hours? That bad...
Me and two guys that I made Eskimo bros all soberly slept together in my bed
I feel like on the last day of finals we should run around campus dressed like Moses screaming "LET MY PEOPLE GO!!!!"
I'll start the recruiting
i like that he makes me laugh. those are like my two favorite things. laughing and fucking.
Sorry I bailed on you yesterday. I was propositioned.
And you don't turn down margaritas and oral.
Randomize
