I cant date a girl that sucks dick at sucking dick
Just hide your weed in your baby brothers shirt. TSA wont check a baby, thats fucked up
was just hit on by a homeless lesbian. forever alone.
I need you to come over. Im crying, day drinking and working out simultaneously.
Got my bloodwork back and my liver is in tip top shape. Apparently blacking out 5 nights a week isn't cutting it, so we've got to step it up until I see that all of my hard work is actually paying off and doing some damage.
Dude she's on meds. He has a ginormous penis. Ur A dumbass. That concludes our feelings chat. Dim Sumday?
Dude, did you really "knight me" and tell me I had permission to bang your sister last night?
It's a never ending cycle of men I've fucked knowing other men I've fucked. I need a new town.
I'm your Election Erection Connection
I retroactively revoke all sex we've ever had.
I have a gay crossdressing neighbor that's dresses up as a slutty pirate. 6 beers from now I would have hit on him. I hate halloween.
I partied with 2 slutty ninja turtles from Sweden last night, I Love Halloween.
im drinking out of a pineapple, so yea.
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU
MANY MANY THINGS AND MOST OF THEM ARE YOUR FUCKING FAULT
I can guarantee he will smoke me out and I won't feel bad about it because he gets to touch my butt.
Well now you know... If you can get over the awkward... The dick is 10 min away.
Oral stamina is what keeps life exciting
Randomize
