if all i could do was poop and smoke weed, i'd be eternally happy
amen to that sister
you said "tonight pinky, we take over the world" and then came in my face
This freshman just ran out of her seat in a 200 person lecture, opened the emergency door and vommed everywhere. Then quietly went back to her seat. $2 Pitchers hit someone hard last night.
My shirt is ruined. If I ever get the idea of doing a tequila shot through my nose ever again, shoot me.
I never thought I would say this but I have to clean queso off my vibrator
New drink: empty coke can vodka water maple syrup. Get on my level
He said he could outsmoke me so I challenged him to a weed duel. I don't always very competitive but when I do...
If that orgasm indicates how the rest of the year is going to go, I need to buy rain boots.
just curious, were the inflatable penis' received? Amazon says they were delivered.
Is Facebook telling the truth about your nipples?!
I'm only gonna ask u this once. Y is there a picture of u only in superman underwear rubbin ur nipple on facebook????
Uh I can actually explain that one..
I want to create a human. Discussion later.
Let's just grow old together and be the crazy ladies that sit on the park bench, drinking booze from flasks and loudly talk about people who walk by.
This chick just walked out of the men's room with molly all over her nose and her shirt half unbuttoned. She nodded to all of us and said "gentlemen" as she exited
So he called his lawyer from the bar to confirm the cost of hitting the douchebag before flooring him. I respect his planning skills.
Randomize
