They have glow in the dark condoms. That's so scary.
Something like a penis light saber.
You think the Elephant Man ever tried to pick up chicks claiming all his appendages were elephant-sized?
We videoed ourselves having sex... I now know why I close my eyes during sex
I love how I just got my coachella ticket and ecstasy in a package deal.
She gave me a rubber ducky to make me feel better while I was throwing up.
The heaters out again. Makin a fire in thebroke toilet for warmth.
Hey dude this is some next level no homo shit but im gonna get 2 tickets to the opera and go Hail Mary on this one girl. U take the extra ticket if i fail.
So what kind of fun pills do we have for the amusement park tomorrow?
I didn't even know this guy existed until he'd had his hands down my pants, so I just went with it.
My new boobs got me 12 drinks at the concert. Whose the real winner here?
I woke up with my face covered in mustard. Your mom said I ate hotdogs like a pornstar
Saw my drug dealer at Easter mass with his family so that was weird
Getting drunk at 9 am is not a super power.
Is it sad to eat a candy bra by yourself?
dont know what thebfuxk is in rhat shit, but dont lemme have antmore
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