The bar is filled with bros right now. Sucks I had to pay $5 to find that out.
What a fucking waste of an outfit
So... how did lowering your standards work out last night?
He wanted to take me out and said we could "go huntin in the woods."
she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
do people really wait til 5 oclock to start drinking in real life?
I just woke up with a bunch of French fries in my hand and a chocolate shake balancing on my pillow. Lovely.
I waited so long to accept his friend request that he canceled it. So I added him and when he accepted I deleted him. I wonder how long this will be funny to me
Find me a date. With a beard. I want him to rub his beard on my tits. I'm not even into that stuff but I think it'd be so warm.
Last time we talked he was trying to sext me but he was including pictures of fruit
I don't care how sexy you think I look in my scrubs. Wanting a blow job is not a medical emergency.
Some male strippers are here, I threw pancakes at them. It's ok
That moment when a stripper is the one that makes the two of you have to define the status of your relationship...
I never truly understood the phrase ball is life until I started having to balance NBA finals and all these men with balls i'd like to handle.
Cooked. Eating pizza. Didn't have a napkin so I took my shirt off and I'm using it.
Randomize
