I just got asked by a man in the alley if i would like to buy 50 dollars of meat for 20 bucks. Its been a weird day.
Becky drew a cock on my face and is making me sit on the step.
what did you do that she drew a cock on your face and supplemental questions why did you let her?
Can someone please explain to me how I got rugburn on my tits?
iPhone photo doodle is awesome. I gave my vagina some lazers and sent it to him. He has a whole series waiting on his phone for when he gets off the plane.
I just realized that I'm gonna have to lower my standards if I want random head.
You should make it a point to use vocabulary that is competition appropriate around him, like "champion" and "training" and "victory sex"
LEAVE MY LITTLE DICK OUT OF THIS
Shitshow foam night was such a success
I didn't want to walk to anymore parties because I found a cat. It was magical.
Your mother may get texts again about women putting dog food up their vaginas and asking for it to be licked.
Walked into a bathroom stall to pop an addy for my three back-to-back finals today. Felt like Clark Kent walking into a phonebooth.
Doing laundry. My jeans from last night smell like chicken wings and motor oil.
I just wanna get high and take a fucking awesome nap. Those are my goals for the week.
Fuck you. Leave my nipples out of this. THEY DID NOTHING TO YOU
Its only once in a life time you get to pick your vcard swiper up from jail
Randomize
