is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
We sat in your minivan all night in a parking lot pretending we were in the magic school bus going to the sun
drugs are my only escape from this reality. good thing I got it at a discount price last night
im sitting in my room wearing my power rangers shirt watching a movie about a magical dragon. Ive totally forgotten what having a sex life is like.
OMG. if college stays like this, theres no way i wont be pregnant by first semester
Lame. Party is tapping out at 4am. Even chanting "USA" didn't rally them.
bark. im thoroughly looking forward to kegs and eggs. next weekend should be pancakes and pinnical, then cereal and seagrams and then whiskey and waffles.
She made me take my shoes off outside her room but she didn't make me wear a condom. I am confused.
I had to make out with him. He bought me a few drinks and he was an Angels fan. As a Yankee fan that was my way of saying good game and sorry we beat the shit out of you
I ate shit on a rock, and when I got up this car full of people asked me if I was okay, and I just sprinted away screaming "I am a banana!"
A big dick and how quickly they respond to snapchat is all I look for in a guy
He's in the same dorm as me. We are sharing a laundry room, gym, and cafeteria. I'VE ALREADY COMMITTED DORMCEST AND MOVE-IN DAY ISN'T UNTILL NEXT WEEK!!!!
It's very rude to dive mouth-first into someone's crotch without knowing if their wife is cool with it.
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score onr for mom.
I'm at this party and a blind kid just walked in and asked "where is the fucking pong table"
Randomize
