You lit the bowl with a rolled up paper towel that you ignited on the stove.
Just found out its our ciliated mucous membrane that traps the molly when we snort it. Biology does relate to life
Im beginning to think that if I ever write an autobiography it will have to be mostly fill in the blank.
I'm not drunk enough to eat silly string
He calls it "his noble steed" and i plan to ride it.
It was like the perfect storm of bad decisions.
You then proceeded to tell me how good of a cook you were and put raw cookie dough in the champagne.
she's five days sober.....are those consecutive????
5 days not 5 nights... like a bad hotel/vacation deal
Why can't people give useful wedding gifts...like sex swings or Nutella?
Just bought weed from the ice cream man. The kid in front of me got a tootie fruitie.
TSA literally pulled two bottles of whiskey out of my bag. Once he saw the leopard print socks and the mickey mouse tank, he put it back in my bag and said "Have a fun trip, man."
well, mom whipped her new boobs out at the dining room table. So yeah you could say we had a pretty casual thanksgiving
I miss you.
Yeah, I don't want to have sex.
Upon further investigation my nipples are bruised and I have teeth marks all over.
Just filed for child support I hope he gets the paperwork on Father's Day
Randomize
