i met him on craigslist. and no i'm not a hooker.
that's the second time you've been mistaken as a prostitute. maybe life is trying to tell you something
its my fault though, i'm wearing tights
you're hiking in tights? you remind me of dennis quaid's fiance in the parent trap
Why are you ignoring all of my texts?
The power was out.
i keep myself tagged when other girls look bad/ugly so i look better
Medical school killed my enjoyment of porn. Hard to keep a boner when you're diagnosing all the actor's STDs and skin disorders.
I've had enough of this chick, she wanted to cuddle after giving me a handjob. I feel like I'm in junior high
im pretty sure all they do is fuck. and talk in baby talk. its two babys fucking basically.
I just got while a charlie horse while orgasming...most confusing feeling ever...
she's a gynecology student. i don't know if my dick's ready for that kind of pressure.
If there is a god, you will have pink eye tomorrow.
Of all the things I am low enough to do, how could you even doubt if that was one of them?
I feel like I just lived out a children's book called "The Day I Went to Law School Stoned"
I am here to underwhelm you with my vagina
What?! Why else would they put table cloths on a table if not for discreet oral sex? That's why they were invented! Read a book...
Where does drinking Flat, warm beer from two days ago rank of the No Fucks Given scale?
Randomize
