I'm pants shitting drunk right now
Well i just learned hong kong is a country...thank you olympics
at the topless march for equality..and wow.not all these boobs should be treated equally
i just remembered last night waiting for you to pick me up wearing my bra on my head to protect me from the rain
boobs and vodka. thats all i can remember, finals week needs to stop ending like this..
Nyquil jello-shots aiding in health and happiness
ASS. GYMANSTICS. OLYMPICS. NOW!!!
I think I may have some undocumented and undiscovered std that causes girls to go bat shit crazy. How you got it is beyond me
I can already tell, the amount of fun I'm having right now is not nearly going to compensate for the amount of "let us never speak of this again" I'm gonna have tomorrow
yyyea i think im gonna go get a bowl and play skyrim. And by bowl i mean something i can throw up in, not weed
Could you just like have a friend who feels bad for me and secretly always wanted to have sex with me
Sad realization: so long as I use this sleep apnea machine, I will never be the little spoon!
Road head absolutely translates. That's the beauty of road head... It's so portable!
I walked into your room and you were wearing party beads, a foam finger, and reading the dictionary. Good night?
So what happened at girls night? My roomate found me passed out locked out on the front steps of the house and it was raining. Yes low moment
Randomize
