do you believe in love at first sight?
awwwwww =)
yea.. so can i have your sisters number? thanks!
quit making up holidays to get me to go drinking with you
He would only do it doggy style. The "he's probably gay" debate rages on...
you force-fed me gummy vitamins while screaming "I JUST WANT YOU TO BE HEALTHY" i have never been so terrified in my life.
Two words. Shotgunning Cognac.
This has already gotten way out of hand
I'm not really sure what went on in my mouth last night but right now it tastes like what I can only imagine is a mixture of astroglide and peanut butter. You hungry?
it was a frathouse cornucopia of foul mixed drinks and "sangria", which im convinced was blood and pcp
I feel that shower jager is exactly what this man needs after last night.
You're a disgrace to gay men everywhere.
STOP TELLING PEOPLE I PEED ON YOU
One huge ass giant mistake followed by celebatory shots and coors lights thats my day in a nut shell
I choose McDonald's breakfast at 1:28am over sex anytime
i just used a selfie stick to take an ass pic. i hate myself.
WHY DID I MAKE A 7 minute video of me eating crackers and cheese when I was high
Send it to me
Did you fill my inhaler with tequila?
Yeah, so?
You reached new levels of laziness. After we woke you up to take shots with us, you stayed in bed so you didn't have to move when you were drunk and sleepy
Randomize
