took out my tampon, fucked him, and put a new one back in all before he realized I was on my period. beat that one bitch.
It totally doesn't make me a groupie if I hooked up with him before he was in the Olympics
I don't want to eat him, he probably tastes terrible.
Just topless shotgunned a bud light alone. I am about to peer mentor the shit out of these freshmen.
Just found a pack of birth control on the corner of Oakland and Thomas, so if your desperate its up for grabs.
My sugar daddy is a bigger asshole than i am. What's wrong here?
Then he rubbed shampoo all over my arm and shouted, "Garnier FUCK THIS."
Is it too early to get staydrunk at 1pm on Friday for Monday's St Patty's day
he was high. i was rolling face. we were both wearing grateful dead t shirts. at that point it's like we had no choice but to fuck
Who's the naked guy asleep in your car?
2016 was supposed to be my year of being a ho, but I guess 2017 might be too.
its 2pm and were already starting beer pong...its gonna be a good night
well true... there's not a real discreet way to masturbate in public
Hey? Just a hypothetical. You ever accidentally kill somebody's cat on purpose? Like you didn't mean to but it had it coming? If you're wondering it tripped me while I was walking down the stairs and I landed on it as I fell.
I just want a man in my bed on a regular basis, who cuddles, and who I can also occasionally hang out with outside of my bedroom. Is that too much to ask for?
Randomize
