What's the name of that girl you hooked up with? The one that looks like the fire hose sign.
I just got while a charlie horse while orgasming...most confusing feeling ever...
she had no gag reflex. and is an abercrombie model. i love college.
he just kept saying "come on iron man, you can do this!" to himself the whole time..
Vodka @ 9pm. Library. Nothing can go wrong, I promise.
First coke bust down the road. Spring is finally here.
there seems to be a considerable amount of hair missing from my left hand. i may have lit it on fire again
If I get laid, we are framing that mattress and hanging it on the wall as the place we both lost our virginities.
You know what, I don't care that I got too drunk and didn't make it into the boat party. If I had, I probably wouldn't have peed on you later while we soundly slept. I feel you need that in a best friendship.
nothing like smoking out of your roommate's bong with your mom to celebrate the rising of christ
he is risen halelujah
You slammed your forties down on the table and yelled "I AM EDWARD FORTYHANDS" then mumbled something about repping Idaho like a champ and laid down on the couch.
Shawn wouldn't stop singing about his cock on the ride home that night it freaked my girlfriend out how consistent he was
Welcome to the club of "Sick of cleaning up actual shit." We meet on the 3rd Sunday of each month. Bring your ceremonial viking helmet.
At least I got steroids and a baguette out of the deal
You where banging on the wall asking us where we hid the door...you then crawled under the deck thinking you'd be safe. I told you to eat the nachos before the party...I told you.....
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