He told me I remind him of his sister...
Was this before or after you did it?
before... I mean, it's been a long time. I just tried not to think of it during.
I asked him where the store BJ's was and he unzipped his pants.
On the bright side, at least we arent the generation raised by fucked up teen moms.
It's Friday afternoon and I'm drunk. This is how I cope.
I was standing when I hit it. I barely made it to the couch before the walls started turning into people.
i woke up hungover wearing my gym shorts and the condom from last night. Wine bar thursdays rule.
Yo plow her in the living room were all outside tommy wants to see
I dropped my keys into the toaster and felt it push down as I pulled them out. Couldn't stop thinking it was a bad idea the whole time.
I still don't know how you've lived this long.
hotboxing with the ex-bf's two most recent hookups. they just realized they're eskimo sisters with his best friend. this is what happens when I come home for Christmas.
You were ¾ of the way through the first pitcher of margaritas then you turned to me and said "Wow I can barely taste the vodka!" And then…….
...Then...
Then I told you margaritas are made with tequila not vodka. You whipped the pitcher at the wall and ordered another one
Under no circumstances is tits McGee to make that kind of decision about my life!
At 38 I had to open a Snapchat account to communicate with my 21 yr bf. where is my life going.
Who put my cat in the fridge?
Realization: many of my behaviors would lead to me being stoned to death in a lot of foreign countries. God bless America.
I was pretty sure he wouldn't be into me after I fucked his brother, and then his best friend, and yet, here I am doing lines off his stomach
Randomize
