We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
I'm playing the Jersey Shore drinking game by myself at my mom's house. Things like this are not okay after college.
A kid wearing a Batman belt buckle in my psych class just asked how people get pee fetishes. I'm too high for this.
I bought a bottle of 100 proof for the storm. I am going to drink until I pass out. I'm taking bets. 1:30 pm is the over/under.
my passenger side seat is covered in alcoholic jello with a nude mannequin in it
Dont ask, hes out back rolling around in the yard freaking out. literally just had a 15 minute conversation, only word i could make out was "yellow"
I felt like a dog for all the times during sex that he said "good girl"
thanks for at least making it out of the pool before you threw up
Just successfully went through airport security with shrooms. It's gonna be a fucking awesome new years
She makes me want to eat babies and throw kittens in pots of boiling water.
I'd apply for another job, but "staring out windows crying" is not a hot qualification right now.
Dinner was cheetos vodka and whiskey. This is what happens when even your booty call breaks up with you.
so i went over to her house and we played crash bandicoot, ate calzones, and had sex all day. im in love.
I’ve got a lot of questions but the first one has to be where you got the flame thrower.
You showed up at 4 am holding a beer and wearing a wig you apparently found in the dumpster.
That explains some things...
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