we need to go to the store. i'm tired of having bud light for breakfast.
do you want me to pick up budweiser instead?
Of course, I believed he would find me irrestible...sloppy drunk, chugging from a bottle of chardonnay, and completely naked because those kids stole my clothes as I was swimming on their private beach
check off brunette on the list of girls tht hit me with there cars and then fucked me later
so i guess now we know you can get away with peeing mere feet from the Capitol if you shout IM PREGNANT at the guards
At 4 am, making my walk of shame, the hotel security followed me to my car with his flashlight shined directly on me. I felt like either a criminal or like I was about to get raped. Can't a girl sneak out of a hotel room without an actual spotlight on her?!?!?!
Two dudes. Loud music. Dancing shirtless possibly naked. Why would I ever need cable?!
WE COULD TOTALLY DO ECSTASY AND GO TO THAT CAT SHELTER OFF OF BROADWAY.
This coke is making my nose hairs dance. That good.
Spent fifteen minutes in the car thinking i was psychic before i realized the cd was not on shuffle
I'll ask around, all of my friends have girlfriends now for the most part though so they're all dead inside
It's accurate though. I am legitimately passionate about pickles. I crave pickles the same way I crave sex. It is a deep rooted animalistic need
Not as great as when your drunk mom grabbed my junk, but better than when your sober grandma sacktapped me and grabbed my butt.
I just felt emotion and I'm not okay with it
Is kiddo a correct name to call someone who you stuck your dick in?
i told her we had a class about unicorns together. i'd say it was a good night
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