have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
Walked into this guys room, saw a tickle me elmo under his desk with white stains in its mouth. This is awkward.
I woke up to him climbing naked through my bedroom window with a bottle of jd in his hand. Of course I had sex with him.
Seriously. My exes act like they own shares of my vagina.
Well, in their defense, they have invested a lot of time and money
while we were having sex she stopped and said, "god is always watching". Then she started again with no other words said. We were fucked up.
and on the fourth day, god made foam parties.
if that blanket by the dog bowl was your dog's "bed" then i apologize to bailey for having sex on it
Vodka @ 9pm. Library. Nothing can go wrong, I promise.
totally worth getting kicked out for trying to throw my drink on lindsay lohans ankle bracelet.
Our house almost burnt down last night. I woke up at 4:10am to the smoke alarm going off bc the bean bag chair was on fire so i extinguished it and smoked a bowl at 4:20 to celebrate my fire extinguishing abilities
Not sure how ur night is going, but unless u also saw a naked drunk chick pissing outside i doubt it can top mine
Someone sharpied "COCK HUNGRY" on my butt cheeks last night. When the fuck did I have my ass out?
classified somewhere between kinky and medically inadvisable
you showed up at my door at 3am, handed me a bag of cold chicken nuggets and said "lead me to the non-irish Siobhans," do YOU think you were tripping?
When ur uncle gives you free weed, you take it
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