Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
he refuses to go down on me anymore when he's high because he thinks my clit piercing stares at him
Herpes is a lot like Arnold Schwartzenneger. Because it always comes back. Also, because it is usually in some way in control of California.
but really, i care about skinny girls as much as michael vick cares about rotweilers
my dad is drunk dialing our relatives who are stuck in a blizzard asking them to pick up sun tan lotion for him cause hes too drunk to drive to the store.
right before he passed out he said "take care of your tender spirit"
just chugged some gatorade and threw it up. todays gonna be awesome
My clit ring got caught in his beard. Never. Again.
Next time I see you, remind me to tell you how I fell through my attic door and landed on my feet in the garage on the first floor.
Well you wanna do it now or later? I've had three shots and I'm listening to journey by myself. Emotionally there is no better prime time than right now.
Can we skip lunch and do power hour sex time from now on? I'll let you eat nachos off my body if you really need the food.
When we found you, you were half crying/half singing Taylor swift songs at 2am in the bathroom, and occasionally puking. I think I get "friend of the year" award just for putting up with your drunk ass all night.
I woke up on the couch screaming in pain. I don't know how ended up there or why my foot was double the size. all I know is I'm now in a cast and never drinking tequila again. worst hangover ever.
He was talking about his friends deceased ferret and I still managed to orgasm.
Now THAT is dedication!
Still had our rainbow strip poker new years tradition. End of night we were only wearing mask.
Did you get the usual surprise pics from the strange straight you like to sprinkle in.
Randomize
