Um, I don't know who U MEANT to send that to, but yes I WAS going to fuck you. Instead you can go play Halo with ur friends.
Look at the bright side...I have an 11 inch penis
You need to find a way to go down on me and lick my toes at the same time
I'll google it
Since when does sleeping with your RA not result in free meal swipes? I feel so tricked...
These eggs taste like chocolate chip cookies. This is the best hangover ever.
I'm currently day drinking, studying and making corn. Don't tell me what I can't do.
Food lion is just a portal. Cheetos are the goal. Its like not banging a super hot chick cause she is french. She still has the same parts just from a different box.
Now I am going to fly my toy helicopter in the dark.
I don't remember much of half-time. I do remember climbing onto the roof of the fraternity and telling people I was going to stargaze in French.
bring the dog... nobody goes to jail with a dog.
It's been a long time since I got "Talk about Glen's enormous penis" drunk
Don't tell him that you hope he dies in a boring missionary position with his wife. That doesn't go over well.
Okay so I just had a really great idea
no.
I thought I came here to hook up, not for a Study Abroad 101 session
I was informed this morning that I took all my clothes off and ran around the whole apartment complex. Being as they just moved in, welcome to the neighborhood.
Is it bad that we left the kid passed out on the bus? I think his name was texas. I was too drunk to be questioning this.
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