On the quad today: An amish choir singing something weird, and not 30 feet away 3 girls tanning topless. Definition of diversity.
We broke two of his toes while having sex. He laughed said he'd fix it in the morning and kept going. I think I'm in love
still finding ketchup in my shoes. thanks to graduation that is probably the last time ill ever say that..
I'm doing lines by myself in the kitchen. I think your outside. yeah that's you. your naked.
I'm pretty sure I got a cavity today due to how many times I've puked hungover at work.
Yes ma'am.Im also looking at my collection of penis pictures in my email playing "who;s penis is that"?
We had a threesome and he gave us bottle rockets and a lamp for our apartment
Bobbing for jello shots in a bucket of long island. Fast track to alcohol poisoning.
And thanks! There are perks to polyamory. And birthday orgies are one of them
so like
i may have gotten a little bit of blood in the charging port of my phone
right now I am washing the alcohol and shame off from last night
Please don't give away my fajitas
Woke up in my boxers on a subway with a phone number written on my arm in lipstick..Best Night EVER.
Stacy was in the bathroom puking, so he peed out the window. We were eight stories up.
you can't just call dibs on my vagina bro.
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