It's sad because pictures are supposed to say a thousand words, and theirs just say 'fat'
no they seem fine, they're doing push ups and waiting for a charging toy helicopter
You stood up gave the stripper 15 ones in a wad, hugged her and then sat back down.
Considering the fact that you wouldn't give me my cat last night because he was "destined for broadway", yeah, I'm accusing you of stealing him
The homeless guy out front said it's his birthday and he asked us to join him for happy hour after work. He's buying a fifth of gin to celebrate.
So watch family guy till our brains melt and then bang till our bodies hurt?
holy fuck that shirt looks so good on him, it was like he was born with it on. that shirt deserves a blow
I have a surprise for you
Is it drugs? I want drugs. Or a puppy!
I'm going to fuck every single member of the men's olympic swimming team and no one is going to stop me
I choose McDonald's breakfast at 1:28am over sex anytime
I drank enough to tranq a steed. You really missed out
He knocked me in the face with the phone during my light show. Didn't even feel it. Ecstasy is amazing
I think I need to start sobriety testing my Tinder dates.
What is the acceptable way to offer a trade of sex for a few hours of body heat?
It's a classy one I promise! Their toilets are cushioned an tier wifi is named hummingbird
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