so I guess it's not okay to mix vodka and ..everything and then proceed to offer a lap dance to ...everyone.
Knee deep in strippers, everything is comped. will try hard to be there at 8. i promise.
I'm scared. I feel like she's my mom and she just walked in on me having sex. Like she's "disappointed"
My history teacher just took his shirt off cuz the classroom was to hot. And then he invited us all to join him.
hahaha my homeschooled cousin put up graduation pictures. it's just her standing in front of her fire place. With a hand made diploma.
I am highly attracted to the men and that's all i can say. I do not clap and make noises but i do turn to the side and say how i'd do incredible things to them if given the chance
It's official, I've know hooked up with everyone I carpooled with in middle school
And this is the part where I need you not to judge me. Remember that I have never seen a penis do that and that I have a weird sexual curiosity
I may or may not have just sent the bartender a pic of me in my slutty cheerleader costume with the caption "rah rah ree, gimme yo d"
He came so hard he burst a blood vessel in his eye. Do I have to take him to the ER? because I'm too tired for this shit.
I just commented on the education level of his penis.
He'll only communicate through snapchat with pictures of him holding his cat or his dick. Bit of Russian roulette opening them in public but I did it anyway.
If he doesn't fuck you on the 4th of July, he doesn't really love this country.
sometimes you just have to listen to beyonce and cry. that's how life works
& I came downstairs to find my whole family discussing the fact that I have a vibrator, which my mom found accidentally....
Randomize
