Do you still like to have your hair pulled?
No, I never liked having my hair pulled. I think you have me confused.
I told him I don't date guys unless they play a musical instrument. So, he's here and he brought a kazoo.
I expect to be treated like a lady. Even If your sticking it in my ass.
That's science, my friend. Boner science.
College is a time for personal growth. Meaning it's time to start using those pickup lines on randos at dive bars.
Boats looked like robot pelicans and time was slow and now im on wipe out
I am officially now FB friends with my arresting officer.
Wanna play whack-a-mole in my pants?
Your word choices worry me.
I'm pretty sure I just smoked a chunk of cat food. Thought it was something else. No reply needed.
anyone can pick a bar fight and pick up a waitress at a bar, not everyone hangout with two wolves. TWO WOLVES.
you never un-have a 4some
Maybe I'm not hungover. Maybe I'm actually dying.
I plan to try out my new vibrator and watch Star Trek: The Next Generation. It's a busy night.
So I'm trying to figure out how to talk my boss into allowing pajama day once a week. Any ideas?
His bedroom is the preferred destination of MILFs, cougars, recent divorcees and sexually frustrated wives
His penis is my hero
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