dude, your ex-bf is on match.com
details on that.
well, his profile doesn't say anything about herpes.
Dude, you posted a cap of a porn to survey if it looked like me. That's pretty certifiably creepy.
The seats are awesome but you see two of each player.
Call me pathetic, but saying "tits for ireland" is working out really well on chatroulette today.
Listen, what he fails to understand is that the Olive Garden does not equal pussy.
i just heard her through the wall saying "not on my face! NOT on my face!" then a scream and "I SAID NOT ON MY FACE!!!"...nice work dude.
So my girlfriend used a threesome to tell me she wanted to leave me for a girl... Not entirely sure how I should feel about that.
The bartender from Thursday remembered me... And gave me a FLAMING BUCKET of alcohol.
$100 bras are my way of telling my boobs that I love and appreciate them, and all the metaphorical doors they have opened for me.
Oh, and I'm only keeping her around till spring. Doing the hunt for cunt is too tough in 12" of snow.
Id fuck him but only at his house and he had to stay im bed till i left. He only works upper body. It just creeps me out how tiny his legs are
I sent him a tit pic with the caption, "Mt. Arie and Mt. Hola are ready for expedition." Too nerdy?
I'm eating year old chocolate from the trash can. It was in a ziploc bag but still, this is a new low. Help me.
Would it be weird if i sent him a "happy fuckiversary" text?
New life goal: Sex in a parking lot surrounded by a circle of fire.
Randomize
