Im so hungover
Come over i have rolls
Ecstasy rolls or Challah rolls?
We need to either start getting drunk more often or one of us need to start doin drugs
Wtf? Why?
I want awesome conversations to show the world.
then you asked me to turn your jeans into "jorts" just long enough to cover your ballsack
Just ordered a clown who does balloon animals. No backing out now.
Do you want the something i can tell my mom in ten year version or the you're gonna call me a whore but be proud version?
He said in a slur "I go so hard, even when I..." and cut himself off by projectile vomiting all over the ice luge.
You were so excited to be getting 4 tickets to the Whale Rodeo.... That high
Sitting on the curb by new england comics with a weeping drunk girl who's eating french fries saying she'll never be as successful as her sister the hand model. She's scaring the nerds.
Nothing is worse than post drunken playoff baseball loss sex
My chiropractor just high fived me for getting drunk enough to throw my back out this weekend.. Life. Complete.
Exactly. Stay back and unsubscribe from her
You fell asleep on the toilet and he was like uh should I take her off?
pls come tAke this super bath no romo it's just. so nice.
I've decided to have sex with him one more time to make sure I don't like him
I snuck in through the doggy door to get his vodka. Do you think my ex will know?
Randomize
