Yah man, that place is surreal
Man, I'm from Tennessee. What the fuck is surreal?
Thats cool. we found a cat INSIDE a coke machine.
On a scale of one to trashy, how is this: Got drunk, gave a guy a hand job. In the middle of the bar
I think you broke the trashy scale
I was so hungover that I had to stop in the middle of the game and throw up. The fans cheered.
11am puke and rally. THIS is what I'm gonna miss about college.
She always acts like she's doing me a favor with a hand job. I've been giving myself hand jobs for almost 20 years.
The bar owner gave me permission to push people into the pool. I'm never going to leave Los Angeles
Don't worry. I told him just because you've gargled some balls in the past doesn't mean you'll be handling his.
I really wanted that to be shared. Thank you.
Good for him. He wanted to accomplish walking across niagara, I'm hoping to accomplish not throwing up tomoro nite, we all have our own priorities in life.
She's cute, but batshit. Like some kind of dominatrix disney princess.
blew off easter dinner with the fam to go play shot roulette. woke up in nothing but my boxers in the back of a random pickup truck.
She pulled up to the bar in a limo, wasted, and alone. Gets out, shrugs and slurs "I couldn't find a cab" and proceeds to take a shot.
I'm in love.
my sex drive just dried up, fell out, and is rolling on the floor somewhere.
At least Shia Labeouf would encourage me to do this drinking contest
Well, fuck this election. I'm getting drunk, regardless of who wins.
Randomize
