I wannas sexs uuuuu
she said i have a nice penis, i told her only bob saget and god could judge that.
Her vagina was like a man-sized safe.
i hope you realize that ur overconfidence only gave me one orgasm out of all the times we had sex. that's like a 1% success rate. u might wanna rethink how amazing you are.
he stopped mid-fuck to ask me how my day was....
I've also hijacked your can opener. Sadly not for the same sexual reason as the muddler.
i woke up to something itchy on my head. it was his mustache. he fell asleep face-plant style on the side of my head. WTF?
I was looking at your puke while I was peeing in it the next morning and that ceasar salad did not treat you well
who dressed up as a cop at your party???
idk I have to check. Why?
he gave me the best strip search of my life. FIND HIM.
Then my perve supervisor asked about your vagina. And I was like nunya, but its glorious
pretty sure tht was the guy who once went to the club dressed as waldo. he still looks weirdly fuckable.
Dude she tried to bite my face off last night, literally. I have never actually felt like a piece of meat until that point in life...
I love everything about him! His penis, his hair, his tattoos, his penis, his cat, his penis.
I just wanna suck his dick on my balcony ya know
We just had a contest for who has less of a gag reflex...I am sad to admit that my mother won.
Randomize
