Bel-fucking-mar, this place has more popped collars than a Hollister catalog
she looks like luggage that fell from a plane
I had a talk with my mom about respecting myself and not acting like a whore so she will rip my nose ring out if she somehow sees that picture
do girls know yet that the best boners are in the morning?
Great. I get laid, Leslie Nielsen dies. I can't have have sex anymore, the film community can't take another loss like this.
Fuck you come back. The old guy next to me is complementing me on my great choice of ring fingers,
I have a friend that keeps saying he wants to go bear hunting. Thought I would say just walk down church street at night. What intersection is it?
I don't know if I want to live in a world where i can't fuck an exes brother.
I WISH WE COULD PLAY THE DRINKING GAME TOGETHER AND THEN BANG FOR AMERICA.
Like wrapping my dick in silk, wrapping that in velvet, and putting it in a cloud. A warm, tight, wet cloud.
Downloaded the Pocket Penguin app. There are now penguins living in my phone. Technology is wonderful.
The day i have a fb album titled " I have become a townie" you can shoot me in the foot and tell me to get my life together
All I need is $1,500, a beach ready body, a bigger dick & this will be the best spring break ever.
Serious question, on a scale of go for it to what the fuck are you thinking, what's me going to a monk or any religious official and saying "baptize me daddy" in a serious voice?
I should never have to text my best friend asking if she eloped again last night.
Randomize
