come over anyways, right now, right this second
it can be a super quick quicky, then you can go back to studying
wow, that sounds SO fun, please stop enticing me with premature ejaculation
Please return the baby Jesus and sheep to the quad
Said he had been eating pineapple for a week before our 1st date. Not sure if thankful for his consideration or offended by his assumption.
Great News, you CAN smoke bowls with a magnifying glass
You guys crashed sarahs vespa into a snowbank and its still there. not cool.
I'm pregaming for my hair cut. Working two jobs definately taught me how to use my time wisely...
It's not slutty if it's for workout purposes...right?
I totally just found ecstasy floating around in the bottom of my purse, it's almost like good karma from the time I lost that blow...but not quite
It's fine...I've done worse things to better people.
She was wearing my robin hood hat from Halloween shouting "steal from the rich and give to the poor, mothafuckaaaaas." We are taking her everywhere.
It's a sad statement on my day when the high point was getting a pap test.
If you fall asleep, my vagina and I will never forgive you.
its not everyday you see batman on the ground with someone riverdancing on his face bourbon street never disappoints
I need more than 2 fuckable people this is an outrage
Welp, no use in crying over spilt milk. I can't unbang her.
Randomize
