so then she threw up in his asshole
yep..that'll do it.
Did you know that when you swallow it's like 60 calories!?
That's okay, it's all protein anyway.
i wish exes would disappear into a world where we never have to deal with them again, and they can just create drama for each other. Then if they wanted to talk to us, they would have to apply to get a "visa" to come back to our world.
Well, let's be honest here. You're dealing with gay guys... EVERYTHING has an emotional attachment.
you spent the rest of the night making a recipe for mixed drink called "the new years bowel remover". it has 13 parts but judging from the bold all caps, the boiled avocado is the most important
you kept telling her you'd make a great step-dad while cuddling her and rubbing her back...
Does peppermint hummus sound good or am I just high?
this is not the first time I've had hot dogs and 151 for thanksgiving.
Things are burning & the world smells of peanut butter. It's beautiful.
he's a firefighter. like being a firefighter screams MY DICK IS HUGE SO I'M NOT AFRAID TO DIE IN THIS FIRE.
I woke up to the sound of him repeatedly tapping out SOS in Morse Code using his hard cock.
So after my hot dog popped out of the bun and fell to the ground I tried to pick it back up and eat it. He had to kick it away from me to stop me from trying to pick it back up and eat it. I like him.
I know you just got bad medical news... But want some moonshine?
Yeah, sorry about that. Dropped the phone on my face while I was watching porn.
Its amazing how creative youll get when your house has been out of toilet paper for a week and a half
Randomize
