I love wearing low cut shirts cuz then when class gets boring, I can look down and admire my breasts.
Let's have a moment of silence for the guinea pig that drunk chick threw out our window.
Dude I'm looking through my old high school year book and I circled every girl I fucked.. what was wrong with me.
what kind of roommate is she really? she wouldn't even hold my hair back.
When we were grinding I think your nuva ring fell into my shoe
My last two google searches are "shiny things" and "Ohio consent laws." you should visit more often.
Just promise me you wont die... or hook up with an old asian lady playing slots
Cant promise that last part. I won't die though
it was just another one of those moments where you unfriendzone a friend you assumed to be gay
His chest is so hairy i want to pet it with my nipples.
So is seeing the guy's penis that I'm talking to something you're into or nah?
I remember yelling at him telling him that the strippers were "nice people."
I broke a rule
Which One?!
The one where I shouldn't sleep with your friends. I broke this particular rule 4 times.
You're officially the worst brother ever.
I dont remember you getting a condom thrown at you. I think I had a concusion
Reading becomes significantly more difficult when people are having crazy loud sex in an adjoining room
I haven’t been this excited since I found out they sold cases of Jack Daniels.
Randomize
