Dude you just tried to have a one night stand with my ex girlfriend while we were trying to put you to bed upstairs.
but that still doesn't explain how i woke up on the couch down stairs.
Avril Lavigne as a judge on Idol wearing devil ears. it's like every boner you ever had in 2002 just came true.
You know you're a nerd when you lose track of how many times you've gotten turned on watching Glee.
well what she called a "work function" most people call "doing shots with your boss while people throw napkins at you."
Its your turn to fuck our RA next time she threatens us with an underage.
Who topped off the "random beer mix" beer bong with a pinch of pepper?? All you could taste was busch and pepper...
I just saw a group of 50+ year old women all wearing shirts that said "drink up, bitches" ...please tell me that can be us some day.
Their engagement party consisted of them doing shots, yelling at each other, leaving for 30 minutes, and coming back with smiles.
I'd say they're off to a great start!
How are you not embarrassed to know me. I'm a mess right now. I'm a walking, talking tornado of embarrassment
Is cat milk safe for human consumption?
It has gotten to a point where I just want to sit on his face. Less butterflies, more orgasms.
As I came the Sportcenter app played that "dah nuh nuh" chime. Top ten life highlight?
You have not lived until you've had your brains fucked out on a broken down Tunnel of Love ride. Life is good.
I feel like I should be having more sex dreams of my boyfriend than his sister..
Well, I like big penises but it's not like he walks around with it out or anything so yes I think he has beautiful eyes
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